Journey Of Storms

by Paula Bramsen Cullen

A book of insights into the process of psychotherapy and the healing of the mind.

The emotions of therapy— probed and illuminated as only a writer can.  Building on three decades of writing experience, the author draws the reader into the depths of depression, the exultations of joy, the roller coaster of transference and dependency, the release of recovery.  The unexpected medium?  Poetry.  Poetry that is lyrical and accessible to all, arranged as a chronicle of the therapeutic process and giving voice to every patient's unspoken experiences on the “journey of a lifetime.”  For patients, their friends, and relatives and for therapists, teachers, and students.

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DEPRESSION

I am
wooden.
To live
I am wooden.

My children
tap on me.
My husband
leans on the wood.

They think
the wood is
Mother
Wife.

To allow life
its shadowed stain
I've had to become
wood,

to feel what
wood
would feel,
which is nothing.

Invitation        

  When you find magic, you have to tell it.

  The magic for me was not in the depression and anxiety that thrust me into therapy.  And it certainly was not in the searing pain, sadness, and shame through which I trudged on the path of treatment.  But the treatment, the journey, changed me, and that’s the magic.

  The magic revealed itself slowly: in the first glimmerings of joy, the first thrill of hope, the first presentiments of trust.  As I found my way, songs slipped into my heart, colors took on exhilarating hue, and optimism and peace replaced the harsh litany inside me.

  The magic is in the poems.  They are the songs of our emotions—the joy, the despair, the fear, the love.  The poems mark the signposts, the pauses, and the revelations of the journey inward that everyone in therapy travels.

  When I first looked into the magician’s black hat, it was dark and empty.  But now, ropes of bright silk and a superfluity of flowers spill from it.

  Come with me on my journey.  Perhaps it will bring some new insight, some deeper understanding, some expression of feelings felt but unexpressed.

Paula Bramsen Cullen

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Journey of Storms by Paula Bramsen Cullen
Millstone River Press, Princeton, NJ, 1994.
153 pages, 5¼” by 8¼”, trim with four color laminated cover.

ISBN: 0-9637906-6-8 (cloth);  0-9637906-4-1 (paper)

My Analyst

To be like him.
To live in his skin.
To sleep in his bed.
To think in his head.

To put on his clothes.
To bring forth his prose.

To sit in his chair
breathing his air,
touching his hair
that half isn't there.

To be Jewish like him.
To be part of his kin.
We would sit and discuss
what the world's done to us.

And we would nod and know.

Publisher’s Statement

       Each year, tens of thousands of people begin psychotherapy for the first time.  For many this is an anxious time as they try to discover what they will be facing and feeling.  There are countless books that explain the mechanics of therapy but few that convey the feelings that patients are likely to encounter—feelings of apprehension, fear, love, confusion, elation, anxiety, and relief.

       The patients' hunger for insights and knowledge about feelings and experiences in therapy is difficult to satisfy through prose.  Imagine, for example, trying to convey in prose Frost's uneasy guilt in Two Tramps in Mud-Time or Emily Dickinson's leaden grief in After great pain a formal feeling comes.  Poetry is uniquely suited to express emotions such as these.

       Journey of Storms should prove a useful guide for everyone interested in therapy, not only new patients entering psychotherapy, but also current and former patients, practitioners, students, interns, and families of patients.

        Journey of Storms is also a work of literature.  It is a fascination exploration of the human psyche by an accomplished author.  We recommend it to anyone interested in fine writing.

       With our best wishes for your enjoyment,

Millstone River Press